Seedling

Wonder what hurts more
An empty dream or an empty life
What is more of a lie?
You with me or you without me?

I would like to believe my love
That I meant nothing to you
I would like to go with the feeling
That you were not hurt and lost
But still somewhere I hope
That my footprints reside on your shore
And the memories are not washed away
Like the ephemeral moments of our love

Our love was a lie maybe
But was so much more beautiful
Than this dark and empty truth I live
The truth of the life without you

Does it matter my dear
Who drew the axe first?
Who killed that little plant?
And who had sowed the seed?

I never knew when it was that my life
Got intertwined with that of the seedling
And now while I pull it out of my heart
I know this death is my own

How far could I run….

How far could I run my love?
How much could I hide?
At last you had to catch up
And strike your mighty blow
And claim everything I had
Which was yours anyway
You had to squeeze my being
Until I was one with you
After losing myself forever

I fought so much to live my love
I cried, I despaired, I tried, and I ran
Until there was not single breath left
In this tiny being of mine

Now I stand here wounded and defeated
My sunshine darkened by tears
The starlets of hope are lost forever
And so is that tender innocence

I tried to hide from you my love
From that powerful haunting gaze
I cowered down to save myself from
That scathing love of yours

Is this how I was to meet you
Was I to walk through the fire to seek you?

Today as I stand here - numb and cruel
And gaze at you with empty heart
Was this to be your reward -
The result of the mindless persecution?
The infinite heartbreaks and dreams lost
Only to create this empty husk

I come to you but I am empty
I have nothing left to lay at your feet
Our love that was to be so pure
The meeting that was of beings divine
Is smeared with blood from my eyes
And questions unanswered
Litter like corpses on the way

Take what you can soon
For even this husk will wither away
And then you will be left alone
Powerful but lonely Divine